Liverpool FC Forum

[Leonmc0708]

OK ladies and gentlemen, its upon us.

The next game is the biggest game of the season once the fixtures are printed. Forget about cup finals and the like, I am talking fixture day the one everyone looks for is this one.

The prospect of earning the bragging rights by tonking them on their own pityful patch is enough for every scouse red to do a sex wee.

Please do not pollute this thread with the usual "Chelse is our biggest game" New Age OOT fan rubbish, or the "What about a European Cup Final ?" question.

Please post all your best (and worst) Blue nose jokes, videos and anecdotes.

Let me begin with:

The gretest Derby Goal in The last Decade for both its significance, timing and the catalyst it provided to the end of that season.

And then add the words of a famous song.....

Rush scored one, Rush scored two, Rush scored three and Rush scored Four, na na na na na na naaaar................. All you need is Rush der der der deer

[Bad Bob]

My sincere hope is that someone will have a word in Aurelio's ear, should he be playing.  I figure he may be in line to take corners from the right flag and he'll, no doubt, be well-versed in clearing the first man with his in-swingers.  Ordinarily that's good practice but, when playing the Bitters, you want to make sure you hit the first man.  How else is Phil Neville gonna get on the scoresheet?

[LFC_fan]

OK ladies and gentlemen, its upon us.

The next game is the biggest game of the season once the fixtures are printed. Forget about cup finals and the like, I am talking fixture day the one everyone looks for is this one.

The prospect of earning the bragging rights by tonking them on their own pityful patch is enough for every scouse red to do a sex wee.

Please do not pollute this thread with the usual "Chelse is our biggest game" New Age OOT fan rubbish, or the "What about a European Cup Final ?" question.

Please post all your best (and worst) Blue nose jokes, videos and anecdotes.

Let me begin with:

The gretest Derby Goal in The last Decade for both its significance, timing and the catalyst it provided to the end of that season.

And then add the words of a famous song.....

Rush scored one, Rush scored two, Rush scored three and Rush scored Four, na na na na na na naaaar................. All you need is Rush der der der deer

both the 2nd and 3rd links lead to the same clip.

here's rush's 4th goal.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PTofImTTlMY&NR

[davo_LFC]

everton are gettin new sponsors, easyjet...in and out of europe in a few hours

[Bad Bob]

Is it true they're already preparing an commerative DVD for this season: "Off to a Flyer 2: an August to Remember"?

[LFC_fan]

Always when it comes to playing in derbies, ppl get paranoid if the new boys really have the passion to get it thru. pennant and bellamy are english and should know all abt liverpool - evershyt games but what about agger, gonzales, kuyt and aruelio, especially if carra, risse and momo dun recover in time.

Everton being is one thing, but during derbies, anything goes. gerrard can get sent off early in the first half, hell, even philip neville can score (abeit at the wrong end)

though i have no doubt abt agger and aurelio's abilities, still would like to see carra, risse and fowler step in for this one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v....search=

[Lando_Griffin]

Jokes, hey?

OK then...

With their attacking strength, defensive solidity and midfield magic, Everton will win the league this season.











































       

[redmikey]

jokes hey!!

phil neville is not a bad bloke really, and when is his calender coming out as the wife thinks he's well fit      

[CardinalRed]

Great Derby goals? Gary Mac's 30 yarder during the treble year.... Nice!


                                                                       

[Bad Bob]

EVERTON SOUVENIR SHOP

EVERTON TABLE CLOTHS - Suitable for any occasion, but tend to slip down the table after a short while £10.00

EVERTON VIDEOS - All the highlights from the last 20years.
This 10-minute video includes many re runs and is a must for all the fans. £ 9.99

EVERTON BANNERS -Complete with interchangeable slogans e.g.
LEE OUT, ROYLE OUT, SMITH OUT, LET ME OUT etc £15.00

EVERTON BRA -One for the ladies in team colours, comes with little support and no cups. £5.00

OUR LITTLE HERO KEYRING -Complete with a model of Bob Latchford (our little hero) attached £0.50

EVERTON CONDOMS -Come in all sizes from little hero to Big Dunc. Ideal for all the pr.icks in the Bullens road £0.75 for lifetime supply

EVERTON TANKARD -Comes in many styles the most popular being the Kendall model which comes full to the brim with beer £19.99

KEEPER's GLOVE - A must for fans at the back of the stands or near the corner flags to catch any shots our lads may have at goal. £8.99

LEAGUE DIRECTORY - An item for more discerning fans. This quality publication gives directions to the Nation-wide League Stadiums. £25.00

EVERTON MINTS -Helps to take away the bitter taste of defeat. £0.20

EVERTON LIPSTICK -Ideal for kissing goodbye -to the premier league (as worn by our players) £0.99 each

BARGAIN BASEMENT Our annual clearance sale of players (some shop soiled) most come free of charge to a good home. They make ideal garden gnomes and door stops.

[LFC_fan]

Rafael Benitez (RB) and David Moyes (DM) were at a local radio station being interviewed as build-up to the up coming derby game.

DJ : So, here we have the 2 rival managers from the same city , about to go head to head in a week's time. David, Everton has got off to a good start, so what are your aims for this season?

DM : Yes, we got off to a good start but to be honest, its not as easy as it looks. Our main aim this season is just to stay clear off the relegation zone and hope for a decent 15th or 16th place finish.

DJ : How about you Rafa? what are Liverpool's aimbitions this season?

RB: Well, we aim to win the league by at least a 20 point margin, win both the FA and league Cups, as well as make it to the Champion's League final, preferrbaly against barcelona, go down  3-0 at half time and come back to win the game 4-3. that would certainly give our supporters fond memories of 2006/2007.

DJ : Uhm.. Rafa, isnt all that abit over-ambitious?

RB : Well, Moeyes started it first. 


Never get tired of hearing this one. 

[Bad Bob]

Some more beauties...

1) A man was sent to Hell for his sins. As he was being taken to his place of eternal torment, he passed a room where a Everton fan was having an intimate conversation with a beautiful young woman. "What a rip-off," the man muttered. "I have to roast for all eternity, and that mindless moron gets to spend it with a beautiful woman." Jabbing the man with his pitchfork, the escorting demon snarled, "Who are you to question that woman's punishment?"

2) What do you get when you cross a pig with a Everton supporter?
Nothing. There are some things a pig won't do.


3) What's the difference between a Everton fan and a trampoline?
You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline

[stmichael]

phil neville was stopped by police last night after being found wandering drunkenly down the hard shoulder of the M6 at 3 o'clock in the morning.

when asked what he was doing, neville replied that he had simply "forgotten which way he was heading".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f8BBdLyDU_4

[Ciggy]

There goner win the league yer know,
Rafa Beneath us laaaaaaaar,
We will be top of the league when we beat the redsh.ite lid.
Feck off you bitter, no mark shower of b@stards.
Still amusing themselves ringing grounds up and asking for Michael Shields over the tannoy, 2 years on.
If being starved of success makes you turn, evil, School of Science my @rse, school of feckin ASBO'S.

If it wernt fer Heysel we would have won the European Cup 20 times yer no.
This is a clip of the lovely Peebles club in all its bitter glory.
This is the reason these are our main rivals, not Chelsea or the mancs.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v....search=

Lovely bunch arnt they

You shower of bitter jealous no mark scruffengers get yer own ground, I'd rather stick hotrods into my eye balls than share with this scum of the earth.

Now me rants out the way, I will talk about the game
It will be difficult if Carra and Riise are still not fit, not that Agger hasnt dont a bad job but, Aurelio worrys me the way he stands off players and not closing them down.
Sissoko will be back which is a massive bonus, cause expect the sh.ite kicked out of our players.

It will be a tight game bhecause since their win over spurs they think they are world beaters.
And their ugly b@stard gargoyle of a manager will have them and the fans fired up.

Im goin to watch Judge Judy now, but I will be back to post in this topic later 

[davo_LFC]

i think if sissoko is fit we should play him and xabi centre mid and stevie on the right to give us a more physical presence coz these kunts are gonna try and kick the sh.it out of us, hope carra is back aswell coz hes the leader at the back and knows what these games are all about, agger has been class like but experience is needed for this one. I'd be tempted to play with crouch and kuyt for this one, bring robbie or bellamy on later in the game, robbie bags one and celebrates infront of the gladys