1: Michael Jackson did not have a heart attack. Apparently, he went to LA children's hospital and had a stroke.
2: Authorities have released a statement saying that they will melt his body down and make plastic toys so kids can play with him for a change...
3: New reports indicate Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction after eating some 12 year old nuts.
4: Michael Jackson's dying wish was to have his ashes scattered through a bowl of cornflakes, just so he could go through the ar5e of little children one last time.....
5: Conspiracy theory is that he was hit by... no, he was struck by..... a smooth criminal
6: Cause of death:
a) sunshine?
b) moonlight?
c) good times?
d) boogie?