Jokes thread - Post your funniest jokes here

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Postby Dundalk » Fri Jun 26, 2009 9:36 am

1: Michael Jackson did not have a heart attack.  Apparently, he went to LA children's hospital and had a stroke.



2:  Authorities have released a statement saying that they will melt his body down and make plastic toys so kids can play with him for a change...



3: New reports indicate Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction after eating some 12 year old nuts.



4: Michael Jackson's dying wish was to have his ashes scattered through a bowl of cornflakes, just so he could go through the ar5e of little children one last time.....



5: Conspiracy theory is that he was hit by... no, he was struck by.....  a smooth criminal



6: Cause of death:



a) sunshine?

b) moonlight?

c) good times?

d) boogie?
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Postby dawson99 » Fri Jun 26, 2009 9:42 am

trying..not...to...laugh
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Postby Dundalk » Fri Jun 26, 2009 9:43 am

Two paramedics arrive at Michael Jackson's to answer the 911 call,
the first asks the second what they should try first.
To which the second replies, "well I don't know about you but I reckon the ferris wheel".


Farrah Fawcett arrives at the pearly gates and Saint Peter Grants her one wish, so she thinks for a minute and says "I wish all the children in the world to be safe".

The next day Micheal Jackson dies from heart attack.



Whats the difference between michael jackson and sir alex fergurson?

ferguson will still have giggs in august!



Isn't it Ironic that Michael Jackson died at 2:10pm
Where the big hand touches the little hand...
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Postby Judge » Fri Jun 26, 2009 9:44 am

Dundalk wrote:1: Michael Jackson did not have a heart attack.  Apparently, he went to LA children's hospital and had a stroke.



2:  Authorities have released a statement saying that they will melt his body down and make plastic toys so kids can play with him for a change...



3: New reports indicate Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction after eating some 12 year old nuts.



4: Michael Jackson's dying wish was to have his ashes scattered through a bowl of cornflakes, just so he could go through the ar5e of little children one last time.....



5: Conspiracy theory is that he was hit by... no, he was struck by.....  a smooth criminal



6: Cause of death:



a) sunshine?

b) moonlight?

c) good times?

d) boogie?

:laugh:
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Postby dawson99 » Fri Jun 26, 2009 9:45 am

McDonalds are launching a commemorative burger: a 50 year-old piece of meat between two 5 year-old buns.
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Postby Dundalk » Fri Jun 26, 2009 9:47 am

:laugh:

Ah i shouldnt laugh but thats a good one dawson
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Postby Judge » Fri Jun 26, 2009 10:12 am

dawson99 wrote:McDonalds are launching a commemorative burger: a 50 year-old piece of meat between two 5 year-old buns.

looks like dawson is cutting and pasting others work  :angry:  :D
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Postby dawson99 » Fri Jun 26, 2009 10:17 am

well i cant do your original smiley every other post i make dude :p
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Postby Judge » Fri Jun 26, 2009 10:21 am

meoowwww dawson :p
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Postby dawson99 » Fri Jun 26, 2009 10:22 am

oooh, 2 words there judge, thatv has to be worth 3 posts for you :p

don't mess with the bull young man, or you'll get the horns :cool:
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Postby Judge » Fri Jun 26, 2009 10:25 am

yes, as i included an emoticon. well spotted daws
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Postby account deleted by request » Fri Jun 26, 2009 10:30 am

I would keep my distance from Dawson if he's feeling horny mate :D
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Postby Judge » Fri Jun 26, 2009 10:35 am

s@int wrote:I would keep my distance from Dawson if he's feeling horny mate :D

aye and dont visit that shed he lives in either  :D
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Postby dawson99 » Fri Jun 26, 2009 11:08 am

It's even affecting the racing world!!!

Jockeys at tomorrows Ascot meeting will wear black armbands out of respect for Jacko who successfulyl rode more 3 year olds than anyone in recent memory
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Postby account deleted by request » Fri Jun 26, 2009 11:16 am

dawson99 wrote:It's even affecting the racing world!!!

Jockeys at tomorrows Ascot meeting will wear black armbands out of respect for Jacko who successfulyl rode more 3 year olds than anyone in recent memory

:laugh:  :laugh:  :laugh:

And the winner of the funniest Jackson joke is ........
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