Liverpool FC Forum

by **Dundalk** » Wed Jul 08, 2009 1:23 pm

I was really upset when I saw the Jacksons carrying Michaels coffin.

I thought Cool Runnings was on and I f**king love that film.

by **Roger Red Hat** » Wed Jul 08, 2009 1:32 pm

not sure i get that one dundalk

by **Dundalk** » Wed Jul 08, 2009 1:58 pm

Carrying the coffin/carrying the Bobsleigh?

Anything yet?

by **Roger Red Hat** » Wed Jul 08, 2009 2:25 pm

oh yeah - got ya! :laugh:

by **anti-hero** » Thu Jul 09, 2009 12:21 am

Dundalk wrote:I was really upset when I saw the Jacksons carrying Michaels coffin.

I thought Cool Runnings was on and I f**king love that film.

fucking farted laughing at that one.

by **aCe'** » Thu Jul 09, 2009 5:35 am

A blonde is driving down a deserted highway when she gets pulled over.

The cop gets out of his car and asks if she has been drinking and she replies "No".

So he radios the station and asks what to do.

The cop at the station says "Is she a blond driving a lipstick red corvette?" and the cop replies "Yes".

So the other cop says "What you do is tell her to get out of the car and pull out your dick as you walk up to her".

So the cop does exactly what the other cop says. The blond gets out of the car and he whips out his dick.

The blond "sighs" and says please not another breathalyzer test.

by **aCe'** » Thu Jul 09, 2009 5:38 am

One day in the forest, 3 guys were just hiking along a trail when all of a sudden, a huge pack of indians attaked them and knocked them out.

When they woke up, they were at the leader of the tribe's throne.

The chief then said "All of your lives may be spared if you can find ten of one fruit and bring them back to me."

So after a while the first man returned with 10 apples. The cheif then ordered him to stick all ten of them up his butt without making any expression at all on his face. He had a little bit of trouble with the first one and started crying while trying to put the next one in. He was soon killed.

Later, the next guy came in with 10 grapes. The cheif soon ordered him to do the same as the first guy. After to the 9th grape, the man started laughing so hard for no apperant reason, and was killed.

The first two guys soon met in heaven and the first guy ask the second, "Why did you start laughing? You only needed one more grape and you'd have gotten away!"

The second guy answered while still laughing, "I couldn't help it. I saw the third guy walking in with pineapples."

by **roberto green** » Fri Jul 10, 2009 12:36 am

Apparently Lesbian vampires have a easy going relationship

because they only see each other once a month.

Think about it

by **Keris** » Fri Jul 10, 2009 1:07 am

roberto green wrote:Apparently Lesbian vampires have a easy going relationship
because they only see each other once a month.
Think about it

That is disgusting mate :no

by **tubby** » Sun Sep 06, 2009 3:07 pm

That's a good one.

bump btw

by **Dundalk** » Thu Sep 10, 2009 4:04 pm

A man checks into a hotel in Belfast while on a business trip and was a bit lonely.

He thought of one of those girls you see advertised in phone box when you're calling for a taxi.

He popped into a phone box in Gt Victoria Street near the hotel and found an ad for a girl calling herself Erogonique, a lovely girl, bending over in the photo. She had all the right curves in all the right places, beautiful long wavy hair, long graceful legs...... well, you get the picture! He copied the phone number and returned to his hotel.

When back in the room he figures, what the hell, give her a call.

'Hello,' the woman says.

God, she sounded sexy.

'Hi, I hear you give a great massage and I'd like you to come to my room and give me one.. No, wait, I should be straight with you.... I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex. I want it hard, I want it hot, and I want it now. Bring implements, toys, rubber, leather, whips, everything you've got in your bag of tricks. Tie me up, cover me in chocolate syrup and whipped cream, anything you want! Now, how does that sound?'

She says, 'That sounds fantastic, but you need to press 1 for an outside line.'

by **Judge** » Thu Sep 10, 2009 5:10 pm

by **Dundalk** » Thu Sep 10, 2009 6:11 pm

How do you deal with a dog who chases every one he sees on a bicycle?

Tell him he's a bad boy and confiscate his bike.

by **Reg** » Fri Sep 11, 2009 2:34 am

Fat Frank does baseball....... http://i169.photobucket.com/albums/u214 ... seball.gif

by **redhayesy** » Mon Sep 14, 2009 9:14 pm

i felt sorry for the hypnotist i saw on stage the other night. he put 7 rugby players in a trance. studid idiot dropped his microphone & said FECK ME' god, the screams will haunt me for the rest of my life.

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