Liverpool FC Forum

by **woof woof !** » Sat May 20, 2006 5:27 pm

Esterbahn Sherbet Leg the 3rd aka Mustapha Rubb ,part time dog handler and personal chiropodist to the late king of Vulgaria ,noted in the book of Ug for his amazing ability to juggle several .........

by **dawson99** » Sat May 20, 2006 5:28 pm

...small armenian orphans using only his nose. He would also somtimes sneeze the national anthem but he would not wipe his nose after but would wipe his ...

by **woof woof !** » Sat May 20, 2006 5:32 pm

carefully saved dingleberries across the rim of a large ........

by **dawson99** » Sat May 20, 2006 5:38 pm

mancunian who often liked to cover himself in...

by **woof woof !** » Sat May 20, 2006 5:40 pm

Mango and Minge flavoured jelly , available only from ........

by **dawson99** » Sat May 20, 2006 5:44 pm

a little store owned by kazza. in there she also sold pictures of...

by **kazza 1** » Sat May 20, 2006 6:51 pm

many of the newkit members in various sexual positions with dawson and woof. They where taken in a special bondage room in the back of dawson's massage parlour. But who could have taken them and why? Kazza was.........

by **woof woof !** » Sat May 20, 2006 6:56 pm

moved and slightly damp when she .........

by **Lando_Griffin** » Mon May 22, 2006 2:31 am

...realised she'd recieved some flowers from her secret admirer, and also followed through.

Kazza wiped her shitter, then opened the card which came with the flowers.

It read;

"My Darling.
I could not spend another minute without you. Please say you'll be mine.

Yours forever,

.....

by **dawson99** » Mon May 22, 2006 8:59 am

...ciggy

the rest of the people sat in the back of dawsons massage parlour to discuss what could be going on. then lando burst in demanding...

by **Lando_Griffin** » Tue May 23, 2006 2:03 am

...to know who'd been to the papers saying he'd had an affair with Russian tennis sex-bomb Maria Sharapova.
It was, infact, true, but now it was in the papers, no-one would believe it.

He was angry, but Maria's bronzed body was comfort enough.

Thegreedo set about trying to ruin Lando's status with the World's most gorgeous women by claiming he had had sex with him in the toilets at Drayton Manor theme park.

It was an odious lie, and the newspapers running the story were sued for £1,000,000,000 (£1billion, for the thicko's!), despite not having that much, and Lando bought the best house in the World, turned it into a Playboy-mansion-esk abode, and lived happily with his stunning women.

Thegreedo, a sad and embittered man, turned to Judge for help and support.

Judge kicked him in the head and...

by **thegreedo** » Tue May 23, 2006 8:53 am

broke a toe on the chiseled jaw of greedo's handsome profile.

Greedo then, feeling no malice toward judge helped him to apply a splint to the broken digit before trying to learn the extent of the Judges knowledge of Lando's whereabouts.

Judge reassured greedo that rumours of Lando's new found wealth and sexual prowess had been greatly exaggerated. In reality the comedy sumo character had merely won a tenner on a scratch card he had found on the floor while bending down to receive an anal injection from a "strap on" wearing Ciggy and used the cash to by a "tennis honey's" mag he had been coveting for months.

Reassured by this news greedo had a renewed spring in his step, the need for revenge was rapidly subsiding as the sorry Lando seemed to be doing a good enough job of making himself a figure of ridicule without greedo's help. There was no way he could inflict more pain on the gormless individual, every time he caught a fleeting reflection in any window or mirror would surely be enough to break the spirit of the hapless Lando.

Greedo helped the limping Judge back to his feet and bid him good day. Just then both men heard a piercing scream. They turned round to see Dawson with his no 1 lapdancer, Lawrenson sarah pinned to the ground with his hand clasped in a mortal grip around her neck...........

by **Lando_Griffin** » Wed May 24, 2006 12:21 am

"You witless cow! I've told you to stop seeing Lando Griffin! He's bad for business!" raged Dawson.
"But why, Boss?" Enquired Sarah.

"Because he's so rich and handsome, and even thouhg thegreedo keeps spreading bullsh*t about him, he STILL charms you into giving him hot 10-somes for free! Why won't you listen, girl!?!"

"Because he's hot and I want to have his babies, you ignorant cockney w*nker!

"

"Oh, OK." Dawson conceded.

"Lando is my hero!" Wooed Sarah as she dampened her pants with thoughts of Lando's love-making techniques.

Thegreedo emerged from the neighbouring "Fruity Frank and Freddie's" bar, and waddled off like John Wayne to his boyfriend.

When he got in, he kissed JBG and...

by **Judge** » Wed May 24, 2006 7:29 am

stmike on the lips. then both the ex mod and the current relatively new mod (who lives as a tramp in boro railway station), complained that jbg had recieved more lip service.

lando (being a jealous type), gave stmike a glasgow kiss, as he found stmike repulsive

Meantime, lawrensen sarah was breathing heavily, as were dawson and woof.....................

by **Lando_Griffin** » Thu May 25, 2006 3:17 am

...who had just made a fleeting escape from the local Copper, who was trying to arrest them for public indecency.

Ciggy...

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