Whats your occupation? - Dont lie!

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Postby Mikz » Sat Jan 14, 2006 11:02 pm

I used to help my uncle in his fruit and veg shop. We worked well as a pear,in fact we were like 2 peas in a pod. But we fell out and that upset the apple cart.




It might sound like sour grapes but...
  :D I just had to spill the beans on that one
'' Gary lineker may well have scored 5 goals in 5 minutes , but i think you have to say, what else did he do '' ...Jimmy Hill
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Postby andy_g » Sat Jan 14, 2006 11:07 pm

i worked in a glue factory but didn't bond with anyone and came unstuck. i was given the old evo and felt a right pritt.
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Postby Mikz » Sat Jan 14, 2006 11:11 pm

I tried my hand at pottery. I was just kiln myself,so i took my foot off the pedal as far as that was concerned, earth shattering experience it was.
'' Gary lineker may well have scored 5 goals in 5 minutes , but i think you have to say, what else did he do '' ...Jimmy Hill
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Postby Woollyback » Sat Jan 14, 2006 11:26 pm

i used to be a painter but i got the brush-off, it left me feeling a little off-colour
b*ll*c*ks and s*i*e
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Postby andy_g » Sun Jan 15, 2006 12:21 am

i used to be a drag racer but i kept tripping over my high heels
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Postby drummerphil » Sun Jan 15, 2006 12:45 am

i'v been asked to write Gareth Gates autobiography,i've been on it 8 months

but we have got as far as this.............one dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd
ddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddday and we dicided to take a break
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my reason for living

   
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Bob Paisley : "Still we've had the hard times too - one year we finished second."

...
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Postby Mikz » Sun Jan 15, 2006 1:08 am

I was a waiter, and for starters -I had it on a plate. But my boss knifed me in the back and didnt fork out!
'' Gary lineker may well have scored 5 goals in 5 minutes , but i think you have to say, what else did he do '' ...Jimmy Hill
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Postby andy_g » Sun Jan 15, 2006 1:28 am

i was a fruit seller's assistant but really hated the granny smiths and golden delicious and couldn't stop saying hurtful things to them. the boss fired me eventually because he didn't want anyone upsetting the apple cart.
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Postby andy_g » Sun Jan 15, 2006 1:29 am

i tried to start an AC/DC tribute band on a ferry but the owners didn't want anyone rocking the boat.
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Postby Woollyback » Sun Jan 15, 2006 9:57 am

i used to be a trampolinist but there were too many ups and downs
b*ll*c*ks and s*i*e
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Postby Woollyback » Sun Jan 15, 2006 10:00 am

i used to be a hotel porter but the job came with too much baggage. also the manager was on my case so i packed it in
b*ll*c*ks and s*i*e
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Postby andy_g » Sun Jan 15, 2006 11:29 am

i used to make electronic circuit boards. i didn't like it much but i soldered on regardless and tried not to get a chip on my shoulder.
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Postby red37 » Sun Jan 15, 2006 1:31 pm

tell you what..anyone waking up with a cob on should read this! f.ucking priceless thread  :D cheers me up no end.
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TITANS of HOPE
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Postby andy_g » Sun Jan 15, 2006 1:33 pm

i woke up with a hard on... does that count?
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Postby red37 » Sun Jan 15, 2006 1:35 pm

andy_g wrote:i woke up with a hard on... does that count?

only if yer bash the bell-end out of it whilst the missus makes the tea!  :D
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