Liverpool FC Forum

by **big al** » Tue Oct 21, 2003 2:45 pm

I don't know about everyone else but I'm getting very depressed by all this. So I was hoping we could cheer each other up for a change. If anybody has any good jokes about GH please post the here. Or if you know any other football jokes let me know. I know Houlier is a joke himself but that's not good enough.

by **JBG** » Tue Oct 21, 2003 3:13 pm

Just think about Traore, Biscan, Smicer and Heskey trying to play football and you'll get a few laughs (or alternatively burst into tears).

by **big al** » Wed Oct 22, 2003 2:50 pm

JBG I think tears will come first.

by **Redlester** » Wed Oct 22, 2003 7:10 pm

Do you know the story about Shankly attending a funeral and passing the grave diggers on the way in? He told them to do an extra special job. On the way out he stopped and asked them did they take a drink. Their faces brightened and they all nodded in anticipation of the great man buying them a pint, at which point Shanks nodded towards the coffin which had just been lowered and said "then let that be a lesson to you"

by **big al** » Thu Oct 23, 2003 4:01 pm

Thanks Redlester I smiled at that one. I was told by a newcastle fan this morning that Houlier had resigned. I did'nt half smile but the prat was winding me up.

by **REDTILLDEAD** » Thu Oct 23, 2003 4:35 pm

WH SMITH....are bringing a book out for christmas, it,s called "THE GERARD HOUILLER BOOK OF EXCUSES"!! [It could come in handy if you dont fancy preforming up to your usual standards at work, just tell em, you feel tired, er..you played a game of footy midweek,I,m sure you will recieve a sympathetic response?? :laugh:

by **cecil carpenter** » Thu Oct 23, 2003 5:14 pm

A koala bear and a hooker go back to her place and they get
undressed. The koala bear goes down on the hooker for 3
hours straight. She has multiple orgasms. After 3 hours he
stops, gets up and puts on his clothes. The woman is hanging
back huffing and puffing from exhaustion. "Oh God, that was
great! Now I need my money."

The koala bear just looks at her and shrugs. Then the hooker
says, "No, I need my money. I'm a hooker and this is how I
make a living." The koala bear just looks at her and
continues to put on his clothes. The hooker gets up and runs
to the bookshelf and grabs a dictionary and thumbs to
"hooker." She hands it to the koala bear and it reads:
"HOOKER: person who has sex for money."

The koala bear then turns the page to "koala bear" and walks
out the door. The hooker reads: "KOALA BEAR: eats bushes
and leaves"

by **Simlinford** » Thu Oct 23, 2003 7:39 pm

LAY OFF GERARD HE'S THE RIGHT MAN FOR THE JOB

by **THEBARON** » Thu Oct 23, 2003 8:18 pm

Gerard Houllier is walking around Liverpool city centre trying to find a bank or building society to make a withdrawal . He finds a suitable place but unfortunately slips on a dog turd as he enters the pemises and passes out as he hits the floor........Within a couple of minutes he thankfully comes round and is surrounded by several concerned members of joe public who want to check that he is OK. Still dazed and confused Gerard asks " where am I ? "............. One of the staff replies " It's OK Gerard you're in the nationwide ! ". f##k me replies Gerard , whatever happened to the football league ?

by **big al** » Fri Oct 24, 2003 10:55 am

Houlier and thompson on tour in Ireland a few years ago. They walked into a bar, there at the fire was a dog licking its balls. I wish I could do that said Houlier. No boss said thompson he might bite you.

by **cheesecakery** » Fri Oct 24, 2003 1:41 pm

Gerald Howlier is out shopping in town when he sees an old
lady struggling with her shopping

GH : Can you manage, love?

Old Lady: Up yours, you took the job, you're stuck with it.

by **ozzie1000** » Fri Oct 24, 2003 3:05 pm

## ## very funny, he might not be the greatest manager but he has increased our potential as a team,althogh we could do with a fresher manger, after the heartattack he has never been the same. i jus think hes not fit enough to manage in the premiership.

by **Cool Hand Luke** » Fri Oct 24, 2003 3:36 pm

Houllier is useless lump of Sh**e. Blatant but funny.

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