Liverpool FC Forum

by **woof woof !** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 4:20 pm

Once spent a night with me girlfriend who lived in a girls hostel (I sneaked in at 1am) . We overslept,(after a night of violent passion with Woof the Wonder Dog what else would you expect) and we awoke in the morning to the sound of maids cleaning rooms and hoovering hallways accompanied by the Landlady's commands . My girlfriend had to get sorted and go to work but there was no way for me to escape until the morning ritual of cleaning had calmed down so my girl suggested I hid in the wardrobe . Fair enough , there I was crouched down amongst the debris of a female wardrobe (avoid it lads) listening to the by now menacing approach of the Gastapo (in my mind at least) . Suddenly the wardrobe door was yanked open and there stood the Landlady (aka Eva Von Braun) I calmly stod up and stepped out of the wardrobe holding a red size 4 stilleto sling back and asked her "Is this yours ! ? " ,
"No " she squeaked , I strode towards the door (and freedom ) casually exclaiming (with a slight backward glance ) over my shoulder . "Good " :laugh:

And then I Legged it ! :laugh:

by **LFC #1** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 4:25 pm

brilliant.

by **stmichael** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 4:28 pm

woof woof ! wrote:Once spent a night with me girlfriend who lived in a girls hostel (I sneaked in at 1am) . We overslept,(after a night of violent passion with Woof the Wonder Dog what else would you expect) and we awoke in the morning to the sound of maids cleaning rooms and hoovering hallways accompanied by the Landlady's commands . My girlfriend had to get sorted and go to work but there was no way for me to escape until the morning ritual of cleaning had calmed down so my girl suggested I hid in the wardrobe . Fair enough , there I was crouched down amongst the debris of a female wardrobe (avoid it lads) listening to the by now menacing approach of the Gastapo (in my mind at least) . Suddenly the wardrobe door was yanked open and there stood the Landlady (aka Eva Von Braun) I calmly stod up and stepped out of the wardrobe holding a red size 4 stilleto sling back and asked her "Is this yours ! ? " ,
"No " she squeaked , I strode towards the door (and freedom ) casually exclaiming (with a slight backward glance ) over my shoulder . "Good " And then I Legged it !

woof when's the autobiography out?

by **woof woof !** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 4:36 pm

stmichael wrote:woof when's the autobiography out?

Wait till you see the chapter about Dar Es Salaam .

Come on Mofo's embarrasing moments please .You know with hindsight they;re always a laff .

by **84-1106852058** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 4:51 pm

Iwas driving a cab in Liverpool with these 4 drunks in the back when I got a puncture.Ihad already had all that sh.t [which fuc.in way ar ye goin ere lad] and it was ******.ng down just what I needed.I started to jack the cab but was that close to the kerb Iwas taking the skin off my knuckles,much to my annoyance and the comments from these nobhe.ds I had to drop the jack,move the cab and start again.
When Ieventually got the wheel off I couldnt belive it,the tyre in my hands had nothing wrong with it Ihad took the wrong fu.king wheel off.The four drunks in the back pis.ed themselves laughing,gave me 20 quid and walked the rest of the way leaving me severley ******.d off with a wheel to change.

by **Woollyback** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 5:06 pm

I pulled this really fit girl I'd fancied for ages at uni. We ended up back at her place, had another couple of drinks in her room and "retired to bed". I was in Woolly heaven all night cos I'd been after this girl for a while, but imagine my shame when I woke up in the morning to discover I'd only gone and p1ssed the bed :laugh:

Luckily there was an empty can of lager on the floor so I just shoved that under the duvet and went back to sleep, getting off with only a minor b*llocking for spilling beer in her bed

by **woof woof !** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 5:14 pm

Wooly and Baron,l knew I was in the right company .

by **Woollyback** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 5:28 pm

by **Ciggy** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 5:44 pm

@ you 3, escpecially woolly p.iss the bed

by **simic_ie** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 5:53 pm

Wolly, commendations for the quick thinking :laugh:

by **woof woof !** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 6:16 pm

cisses_gona_get_ya wrote: @ you 3, escpecially woolly p.iss the bed

Come on girl ,I know the ladies have got at least one embarassing moment hidden in their knickers .

by **Ciggy** » Fri Apr 08, 2005 6:27 pm

woof woof ! wrote:
cisses_gona_get_ya wrote: @ you 3, escpecially woolly p.iss the bed

Come on girl ,I know the ladies have got at least one embarassing moment hidden in their knickers .