Liverpool FC Forum

[Igor Zidane]

    Top thread .

My mate has a theory , you know when you get splash back , he reckons thats what causes you to get spots on your @rse.

Thoughts?

[woof woof !]

Easy to avoid splash back on yer a'rse, I usually just stand on the seat and drop stuff from a great height, kinda 30 secs over Hiroshima feeling, maybe that explains the radioactive pimples on my feet.

Worst than that though is sittin' on a bog  and the end of yer knob helmet exposed comes into contact with the cold p'iss riddled ceramic bowl    

[Igor Zidane]

Easy to avoid splash back on yer a'rse, I usually just stand on the seat and drop stuff from a great height, kinda 30 secs over Hiroshima feeling, maybe that explains the radioactive pimples on my feet.

Worst than that though is sittin' on a bog  and the end of yer knob helmet exposed comes into contact with the cold p'iss riddled ceramic bowl    

       You are not wrong woof.

That's what he does , he dumps from as high of the seat as possible without it hitting any stray objects on the way down .

Myself i quiet like the feeling of that cold water hitting your botty , especially when it hits you right on the tea towel holder. 

Maybe it's just me.

[andy_g]

anyone here spent any time in japan? the toilets there are fantastic and you can pretty much have a different sh!tting experience every day of the week. different temperature of the seat, a little spray on the starfish from below or not, music, aromas, the lot. igor, you'd love it - a little warm jet of water on the rim a moment after you've dropped is one of life's finer pleasures.

[jonnymac1979]

Never sh!t where you work, is my motto.

Don't mind a little 'Barry White' in work actually, Bob.  I've got Tetris on my phone.  And Wikipedia on the arl mobile comes in handy when you're there forever...

Considering what I do to earn a living and what I'm paid etc... blah, blah, blah, I reckon if I worked it out, I've earned at least if not more £500 this tax year actually pebble blasting the sides of the work bogs...

Not a bad script in my eyes...  shite-ing while you earn...

[jonnymac1979]

Never sh!t where you work, is my motto.

Don't mind a little 'Barry White' in work actually, Bob.  I've got Tetris on my phone.  And Wikipedia on the arl mobile comes in handy when you're there forever...

Considering what I do to earn a living and what I'm paid etc... blah, blah, blah, I reckon if I worked it out, I've earned at least if not more £500 this tax year actually pebble blasting the sides of the work bogs...

Not a bad script in my eyes...  shite-ing while you earn...

Waiting for Peewee's comeback where he says he's earnt Three Grand shitting this tax year.

It's not a competition...  it never was...

   

[Roger Red Hat]

love the feeling of splashback on the old ballon knot.

anyone flush before they dump? wipe the seat with bog roll?

[Sabre]

[woof woof !]

anyone flush before they dump? wipe the seat with bog roll?

does it make any difference ?

[Roger Red Hat]

peice of mind i think. I always wipe around the seat with bog roll and flush first - im a creature of habit

i hate trying to dampen the sound when someone goes in trap 2. Mate of mine at work says a piece of bog roll folded up and poo into the bog roll and drop it down the bog really is the most quietest way. You can try to aim the poo at the side of the pot (inside not outside ) but it sometimes comes out side ways.

[Bad Bob]

peice of mind i think. I always wipe around the seat with bog roll and flush first - im a creature of habit

Good move.   It may not really do much sanitation wise but it tests the plumbing to make sure the last fella didn't gum up the works.  It's the worst feeling in the world to lay some coil, hit the lever expecting it to whoosh away only to look down and see the tide's coming in, not going out.  That happened to me once a few years back and I've never moved so fast in my life--pants up and out of the stall in seconds.  The sound of water cascading down the outside of the bowl ringing in my ears as the washroom door closed behind me.  Felt sorry for the poor fecker in the stall next to me, though.  He never knew what hit him.  And there's another reason why I don't sh!t at work (what if it was your boss next door?) and refuse to go into a stall if there's anyone in the one next door. 

[Judge]

just stare them out through that convenient little hole someone has made in the cubicle wall.

i dunno why, but that comment made me laugh very loud indeed

[andy_g]

just stare them out through that convenient little hole someone has made in the cubicle wall.

i dunno why, but that comment made me laugh very loud indeed

was it because it was funny?

[Roger Red Hat]

what do you do about your dangler whilst your passing a 'richard the third'?

I tend to hold it down under the rim of the seat and kind of point it otherwise disaster strikes like it did a year or two ago when I didn't have control over it. I was busy texting and I started to p!ss. Only I got this warm feeling as my 'three for a bob' had directed the pee through the gap between seat and pot. I'd lagged all over me strides and me legs.

[maypaxvobiscum]

Never sh!t where you work, is my motto.  Thankfully there are plenty of buildings on campus to choose from.  It only becomes an issue when you're seriously pushing cloth and can't manage a 5 minute walk without looking like the Hunchback of Notre Dame.

Also, can I say how fecking stupid auto-flushing toilets are?  Always flush when you don't want them to and never when you do.  Plus, the risk of backsplash is unacceptably high with them for some reason.  Pointless!

can u imagine when you're halfway done and the auto flush gets activated and it creates chocolate milkshake that splatters all over your @ss? lol. it happen to me once but i got off in time.