Liverpool FC Forum

by **The Ace1983** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 1:32 pm

Lists are quite good as well. Start trying to list things like FA Cup Winners since 1975 or the members of Blair's first cabinet. I have to confess that I used Song Association last time, as inspired by the thread on this very site. Now you know why I'm on there all the time.

by **red37** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 1:32 pm

The Ace1983 wrote:I just think of Margaret Thatcher naked.

I wouldn't waste my thoughts having a s.hit over that c*nt...let alone have the horrible Davros headed arl snatch come into me head when im putting the brakes on!

by **The Ace1983** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 1:36 pm

red37 wrote:
The Ace1983 wrote:I just think of Margaret Thatcher naked.

I wouldn't waste my thoughts having a s.hit over that c*nt...let alone have the horrible Davros headed arl snatch come into me head when im putting the brakes on!

Yeah, but not only does that image but the brakes on, it deploys the parahutes, signals a diversion, turns the lights red and builds a great big brick wall across the road.

by **red37** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 1:40 pm

The Ace1983 wrote:
red37 wrote:
The Ace1983 wrote:I just think of Margaret Thatcher naked.

I wouldn't waste my thoughts having a s.hit over that c*nt...let alone have the horrible Davros headed arl snatch come into me head when im putting the brakes on!

Yeah, but not only does that image but the brakes on, it deploys the parahutes, signals a diversion, turns the lights red and builds a great big brick wall across the road.

...and raises the Thames f**kin barrier, all in one fell swoop! Nice one. THE CURE :laugh:

by **maypaxvobiscum** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 1:51 pm

Bamaga man wrote:
Sabre wrote:
maypaxvobiscum wrote:this is so cool!!

First happy user.

Hows the breathing going maypaxvobiscum ?

i will update you guys tomorrow

as Rafa-dodd puts it ----> slam her tuna tunnel

by **destro** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 2:00 pm

maypaxvobiscum wrote:
Bamaga man wrote:
Sabre wrote:
maypaxvobiscum wrote:this is so cool!!

First happy user.

Hows the breathing going maypaxvobiscum ?

i will update you guys tomorrow

as Rafa-dodd puts it ----> slam her tuna tunnel

I thought you was on a getting to know her sex ban, or have you managed to persuade her other wise ?

by **Rafa D** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 2:05 pm

The only sexban I would let any bird impose upon me would be if she had a jamrag on.

Even then, if she wants to....

by **maypaxvobiscum** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 2:11 pm

destro wrote:
maypaxvobiscum wrote:
Bamaga man wrote:
Sabre wrote:
maypaxvobiscum wrote:this is so cool!!

First happy user.

Hows the breathing going maypaxvobiscum ?

i will update you guys tomorrow

as Rafa-dodd puts it ----> slam her tuna tunnel

I thought you was on a getting to know her sex ban, or have you managed to persuade her other wise ?

yes! haha i met her today and she was complaining the sex ban doesnt seem of any use.

by **The Ace1983** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 2:12 pm

For a list of the best innuendos in the world, listen to The Bloodhound Gang's Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo.
My personal favourite is "Park the beef bus in tuna town".

As for raggin' the rag, just put a towel down and keep your eyes forward. Sometimes it's best to do that sort of stuff in the shower.

by **red37** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 2:16 pm

No great shakes...just pick the cobs off yer hat after and give it a quick going over with the old brillo pad...and back infront of the telly. Job done.

by **Alonso14** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 6:03 pm

Wait mintue, does w@nking help or hinder your performance?

by **The Ace1983** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 6:08 pm

Alonso14 wrote:Wait mintue, does w@nking help or hinder your performance?

It depends how you do it. Rushed Knuckle shuffles aren't that good, but controlled liasons with Rosy Palm and her five little daughters can give you a little more stamina. It depends on the person I think. Squeaking the dolphin before a night out (a la "There's Something About Mary") is good if you're naturally nervous but most of the time it doesn't make the blindest bit of difference.

by **kunilson** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 9:14 pm

The Ace1983 wrote:Rushed Knuckle shuffles aren't that good, but controlled liasons with Rosy Palm and her five little daughters can give you a little more stamina.

some of these lines are the best ive read on this site lol. fkin hillarious :laugh:

just goes to show that the only pure joy left is football.
the sh1t your put thru tryin to be a good lay having to think of margaret thatcher and all that is just stooooopid, what fun is left.

i like red37's attitude on all of this. get the job done, enjoy it instead of making it a mission. (no pun intended) and then back to the idiotbox

by **scouser 'til I die** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 9:19 pm

haha this threads a classic :laugh:

cant wait to try some of these "techniques" and see if they actually work

i can't stop laffin :laugh:

by **Sabre** » Sun Sep 02, 2007 9:26 pm

i like red37's attitude on all of this. get the job done, enjoy it instead of making it a mission. (no pun intended) and then back to the idiotbox

Yeh, red37's words are what I'd tell my best mate in the pub with a beer.

But then you know it comes those especial times in which you have to do well if you want to repeat. Let's admit it feeds the ego to make a good match, just like in football. If this feedback was not important, millions of women wouldn't have faked an orgasm through out the years to keep their men's ego happy

As for the question of wanks, most of the times, they hinder later of performance, but not because they're bad, but because the people seek a quick W*nk. Like in football you play on sunday as you train through out the week

If you train badly, you play badly. And if you don't have the natural strenght in those muscles (some people just have) and do not work it, you won't get better. Lists and all that help, but it removes joy from the sex.

Looking forward to hear the feedback. I know Rafa is laughing a lot, but I know as my name is Ivan that he'll try the breathing technique. :nod

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