This is a transfer rumor that I've just made up.
Liverpool FC are about to sign John Connelly, a 37 year old 5'10" 210lb fatty. A "speedster" was his wife's description of him.
"Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you meant a description of him outside of the bedroom. The best description I can think of is , he's really fast in the bedroom and a bit slow once the doors open"
Despite the odds against him Connelly likes his chances of making it into Liverpool's first team.
"I've got a great first touch and I can put a ball into the window of my daughters' playhouse from 30 yards out,My right nut might be a bit larger than my left, but I find it helps my balance."
When asked about his weight Connelly said, " look, yeah I may seem a bit large on the "tele" that's what you redcoats call it right?, well anyway,the TV adds at least 85 pounds so don't fret."
Since he is an unknown player we decided to ask where he had played football before. "Well I played as a 7 year old and that was a tough league, the city I grew up in only had money to have one league, ages 7-13 and so I didn't get a single minute on the field. But over the past year or so I've gotten the chance to coach and I've found that I have a lethal right foot (as far as 7 year old keepers are concerned. I can pass like Xabi Alonso on Heroine, and as far as in the air, well I used to be able to dunk (yes on a 10 foot net)."
"I think I'll be a great signing for Liverpool. Hey, does being a LFC player get me a free tour of the Cavern Club? That's what it said on the brochure."
Signing on a free - 37 year ol american striker
5 posts
• Page 1 of 1
by The Good Yank » Sat Jan 02, 2010 3:11 am
s@int - 13 December 2009
I won't celebrate Rafa going........ but I will be over the moon if Dalglish comes in. League within 2 years if he gets the job, AND YOU CAN QUOTE ME ON THAT.
I won't celebrate Rafa going........ but I will be over the moon if Dalglish comes in. League within 2 years if he gets the job, AND YOU CAN QUOTE ME ON THAT.
-
The Good Yank - LFC Super Member
- Posts: 2725
- Joined: Fri Aug 22, 2008 8:16 pm
- Location: North Brunswick, New Jersey
by The Good Yank » Fri Mar 25, 2011 8:53 am
Okay, playing a game here. Bump up the thread you made when you were completely schnackerred.
s@int - 13 December 2009
I won't celebrate Rafa going........ but I will be over the moon if Dalglish comes in. League within 2 years if he gets the job, AND YOU CAN QUOTE ME ON THAT.
I won't celebrate Rafa going........ but I will be over the moon if Dalglish comes in. League within 2 years if he gets the job, AND YOU CAN QUOTE ME ON THAT.
-
The Good Yank - LFC Super Member
- Posts: 2725
- Joined: Fri Aug 22, 2008 8:16 pm
- Location: North Brunswick, New Jersey
5 posts
• Page 1 of 1
-
- Related topics
- Replies
- Views
- Last post
-
- Striker out striker in? - Should we buy dimitar berbatov?
by spion » Fri Apr 18, 2008 2:16 pm - 7 Replies
- 1975 Views
- Last post by Socrates
Sun Apr 20, 2008 1:07 am
- Striker out striker in? - Should we buy dimitar berbatov?
-
- Rafa will sign a real striker - Real striker number one target
by Leonmc0708 » Fri Jun 09, 2006 2:23 pm - 14 Replies
- 3188 Views
- Last post by metalhead
Sun Jun 18, 2006 10:51 pm
- Rafa will sign a real striker - Real striker number one target
-
- Marc pelosi - American's rising star might join us
1, 2by metalhead » Sat Jul 09, 2011 1:59 pm - 15 Replies
- 5214 Views
- Last post by tubby
Thu Aug 11, 2011 10:05 pm
- Marc pelosi - American's rising star might join us
-
- New striker
by Paul C » Sat Jul 08, 2006 8:26 pm - 9 Replies
- 1815 Views
- Last post by Ace Ventura
Sun Jul 09, 2006 2:50 pm
- New striker
-
- Linked with yet another striker....this time its..
1, 2by LittleHobo » Fri Jun 15, 2007 8:59 pm - 19 Replies
- 3376 Views
- Last post by mr_weed_80@hotmail.com
Sun Jun 17, 2007 6:37 pm
- Linked with yet another striker....this time its..
Who is online
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests
Powered by phpBB © phpBB Group.