Liverpool FC Forum

[stmichael]

when i was at uni i once went to a fancy dress party held by the uni's american football team. the theme of the event was "tv and film stars" so i decided to go as mr t from the a-team. i shaved my head properly, had all the jewellery, green vest, and a gun etc. to be honest i looked the real deal.

anyway after several hours of drinking in the local pubs and a club i was absolutely hammered. on the way home, literally about 200 yards from my house, a scally came up and asked if i could lend him 50p. of course any sober man would never say yes but being chromotosed i got out my wallet, at which point he grabbed it off me and legged it down the street.

instinctively, somehow i chased after this guy (even though i could hardly walk). i chased him for about 400 yards, eventually caught him (by rugby tackling him if i recall) and pinned him down by his neck whilst screaming obscenities at him.

the point is, to any innocent people walking down the street it must have been one of the most obscure experiences of their life. they look across the street and all they see is mr t running after a guy, rugby tackling him and then beating the living sh#t out of him.    

GIMME MY WALLET BACK FOOL

all i needed after the event was a van to pull up, me to jump in and to drive off.

[Judge]

i was in a pub in leeds, was totally drunk with my pint grasped firmly in my hand. i tripped over a small step, fell forward, ensuring no spillage, suddenly i saw some jean like material, so i grabbed it.

little did i know it was a denim skirt belonging to a gorg bird. it came straight down to her ankles, knickers n all. but i never spilt my beer

quality night, she had a fine pair of thighs from my position on the floor

anyway, after that, she did go out with for about two years - nice , thats how you PULL a bird

[stmichael]

i was in a pub in leeds, was totally drunk with my pint grasped firmly in my hand. i tripped over a small step, fell forward, ensuring no spillage, suddenly i saw some jean like material, so i grabbed it.

little did i know it was a denim skirt belonging to a gorg bird. it came straight down to her ankles, knickers n all. but i never spilt my beer

quality night, she had a fine pair of thighs from my position on the floor

anyway, after that, she did go out with for about two years - nice , thats how you PULL a bird

oh right judge, so that was the day you met nell mcandrew then?

[Judge]

no mate. i wish tho'