Liverpool FC Forum

[dawson99]

ok, i keep getting in troble, im not very pc apparently, so i was given this guide, and i thought it would help u guys too

1. She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED  CITIZEN.
2. She is not BLONDE - She is a DETOUR OFF THE  INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.
3. She has not BEEN AROUND - She is A  PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
4. She is not an AIRHEAD - She is  REALITY IMPAIRED.
5. She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets  CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
6. She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY  ENHANCED.
7. She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY  REPETITIVE
8. She does not have PREMIER LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is  PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.
 

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE  POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a BEER GUT - He has  developed a LIQUID STORAGEFACILITY
2. He is not a BAD DANCER - He  is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
3. He does not GET LOST - He INVESTIGATES  ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.
4. He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE  REGRESSION.
5. He is not a CRADLE SNATCHER - He is GENERATIONALLY  DIFFERENTIAL.
6. He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK - He becomes  ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.
7. He does not act like a TOTAL ****** - He  develops RECTAL CRANIAL INVERSION.
8. He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST  PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.
9. He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He  is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.

[Woollyback]

How come a sexist bloke gets called a "chauvinist pig" whereas a sexist woman rejoices in being a "feminist"? Maybe doing dishes all day makes them feel better about it

[stmichael]

yeah and how come when a bloke talks dirty to a woman it's classed as "sexual harassment" but when a woman talks dirty to a man it costs £2.50 a minute?

outrage

[Woollyback]

yeah and how come when a bloke talks dirty to a woman it's classed as "sexual harassment" but when a woman talks dirty to a man it costs £2.50 a minute?

outrage

Mate you're being ripped off, just get the phonebook out and ring any number in Wigan - they'll talk filth for nowt over there   

[stmichael]

yeah and how come when a bloke talks dirty to a woman it's classed as "sexual harassment" but when a woman talks dirty to a man it costs £2.50 a minute?

outrage

Mate you're being ripped off, just get the phonebook out and ring any number in Wigan - they'll talk filth for nowt over there   

i'll get on it. what's the area code again?

[Woollyback]

yeah and how come when a bloke talks dirty to a woman it's classed as "sexual harassment" but when a woman talks dirty to a man it costs £2.50 a minute?

outrage

Mate you're being ripped off, just get the phonebook out and ring any number in Wigan - they'll talk filth for nowt over there   

i'll get on it. what's the area code again?

0800 - D I R T Y   S C U T T E R S   


That reminds me of a sticker on the back of a courier's bike in London - it said "how's my driving - call 0800 EAT SH1T"

[Dom1]

great post dawsonio