Liverpool FC Forum

by **Ace Ventura** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 11:51 am

Right i am work now absolutely fooked after going round me mates to watch the England match last night (i obviously couldnt or didnt give two fcks about the result

)
Anyway, got home about 2.30am smashed and was hungry (allegedly - as i cant remember) put on a couple of cheese and ham toasties and took to the couch to watch sky sports news, the inevitable happened and i fell akip before food was ready.
As i had already disturbed me hobbit (thats the missus, she is only 4 ft something) she came down and checked, finding the black charcoal toasties.
She is now not speaking to me ridiculously claiming....'you nearly burnt the house down'

So my question is, can a toastie result in a fire ? If so after approximately how long ?

Your response could help me argue my case when i return from work hung over to face the music.

Btw our Shankly (me dog) still munched the both of them, dogs are filthy feckers and will eat ANYTHING wont they !

by **66-1112520797** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 12:05 pm

Ace Ventura wrote:Right i am work now absolutely fooked after going round me mates to watch the England match last night (i obviously couldnt or didnt give two fcks about the result )
Anyway, got home about 2.30am smashed and was hungry (allegedly - as i cant remember) put on a couple of cheese and ham toasties and took to the couch to watch sky sports news, the inevitable happened and i fell akip before food was ready.
As i had already disturbed me hobbit (thats the missus, she is only 4 ft something) she came down and checked, finding the black charcoal toasties.
She is now not speaking to me ridiculously claiming....'you nearly burnt the house down'

So my question is, can a toastie result in a fire ? If so after approximately how long ?

Your response could help me argue my case when i return from work hung over to face the music.

Btw our Shankly (me dog) still munched the both of them, dogs are filthy feckers and will eat ANYTHING wont they !

Nah Your "hobbit" is being a typical woman, it wouldnt of burnt down. I'm assuming it was and electric toastie griller type thing ? If thats the case I doubt it.

I couldnt give you facts of the reasons though

But to win your argument tell her to get out of bed and cook em for you next time.

by **Woollyback** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 12:10 pm

shoulda made the missus try them first, make sure they were fit for your dog

by **woof woof !** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 1:33 pm

Woollyback wrote:shoulda made the missus try them first, make sure they were fit for your dog

true.

I left a chip pan full of oil on the stove once . Forgot about it until i heard a "Whoomph" from the kitchen , ran in there to find flames 3 foot high . Luckily for me I was wide awake that night and hadn't dozed off on the couch.

ps , if yer ever have a pan of oil on fire best thing is to try and cover it with a pan lid or something ( I used a chopping board) , the fire will die through lack of oxygen . Don't remove the lid until the pans cooled down or it'll just ignite again.

by **Ace Ventura** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 2:14 pm

Still feeling ill.

Looking forward to round 2 of the kicking off when i get home .

Could murder a toastie now as well

by **Roger Red Hat** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 2:37 pm

woof woof ! wrote:
Woollyback wrote:shoulda made the missus try them first, make sure they were fit for your dog

true.

I left a chip pan full of oil on the stove once . Forgot about it until i heard a "Whoomph" from the kitchen , ran in there to find flames 3 foot high . Luckily for me I was wide awake that night and hadn't dozed off on the couch.

ps , if yer ever have a pan of oil on fire best thing is to try and cover it with a pan lid or something ( I used a chopping board) , the fire will die through lack of oxygen . Don't remove the lid until the pans cooled down or it'll just ignite again.

dont do what me mates sister did and throw the contents of the washing up bowl over it. she still has the scars on her face. :no

...i'd still tup her though :nod

by **Ace Ventura** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 2:40 pm

Lee J wrote:
woof woof ! wrote:
Woollyback wrote:shoulda made the missus try them first, make sure they were fit for your dog

true.

I left a chip pan full of oil on the stove once . Forgot about it until i heard a "Whoomph" from the kitchen , ran in there to find flames 3 foot high . Luckily for me I was wide awake that night and hadn't dozed off on the couch.

ps , if yer ever have a pan of oil on fire best thing is to try and cover it with a pan lid or something ( I used a chopping board) , the fire will die through lack of oxygen . Don't remove the lid until the pans cooled down or it'll just ignite again.

dont do what me mates sister did and throw the contents of the washing up bowl over it. she still has the scars on her face.

...i'd still tup her though

tup ?

Go on enlighten us

by **Roger Red Hat** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 2:47 pm

stick one up her

by **Ace Ventura** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 3:18 pm

Lee J wrote:stick one up her

Thats what i assumed like but where does the tub come into it ?

Or am i being a bit slow

by **Roger Red Hat** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 3:25 pm

I dont know where the saying "i'd like to tup her" comes from. maybe sabre can tell us lol

by **Lando_Griffin** » Thu Sep 13, 2007 5:08 pm

Lee J wrote:I dont know where the saying "i'd like to tup her" comes from. maybe sabre can tell us lol

I believe it's a quote from "Othello".

by **GRAHAM01** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 8:56 am

i have done something like that, i had been out on the lash got home about 3 in the morning starving so put a little oil in a frying pan heated it up put in some chipped potatoes and off i went to watch the box not sure how long later but i wake up and the room is full of black smoke, sh*t i sobered up fast i ran in to the kitchen and there is a smoking black frying pan on the cooker the cupboard by the side of the cooker chard to a crisp

i`m not sure if that was just the heat or if there had been flames burning it, in which case it could have caught and would have burnt the house down

i did my best to clean up what i could but it was no use the insures had to come in and re-done the hole of the down stairs cleaners coming in and stripping the house down to the walls

never once did i tell them i had done it

told them it was the misses and they just laughed

but to this day i have never cooked again after coming home drunk, i have woken her up to do it mind, she did it but boy did i pay for it the next day

the moral to this story is always get a kabab on the way home

by **Roger Red Hat** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 9:35 am

GRAHAM01 wrote:the moral to this story is always get a kabab on the way home

correct. only I got a kicking for getting chilli sauce all over me shoes and down me shirt. :down:

by **Leonmc0708** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 9:36 am

One of the lads from by me, MArk Temperton once came in and threw a few pieces of toast and some hash browns under the grill afer a noight out.

Then he promptly fell asleep on the couch.

Got woke up by the Firemen as they hosed down the burning cinders of his Ma's house.

by **Sabre** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 9:53 am

You're not alone on this, Sabre is a danger in the kitchen too. It happened to me more than once leaving a pan full of oil like woof did. Fortunately a lot of smoke appeared before the flames, it stinks for hours.

Post fiesta nights meals are a must. When you drink too much you reach a point in which you'd do a girl you wouldn't sober. Just the same way, when you've been drinking you eat hamburgers that you wouldn't eat otherwise.

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