Liverpool FC Forum

by account deleted by request » Fri Oct 13, 2006 11:25 pm

They weren’t very good, but we loved them anyway. 10 Players Who Shook the Kop (with laughter)” Following on from liverpoolfc.tv’s excellent 100 Players Who Shook the Kop, here’s a TLW run down of ten players who didn’t shake the Kop with their talent, but gave us a good laugh and will be remembered with a smile.

Let the countdown commence!

10 Torben Piechnik – The likeable Dane arrived at Anfield during a difficult period for the club. Manager Graeme Souness was struggling to get things right, and the club was in a transitional period. Souness needed a centre half, but money was tight. He’d spent plenty already, and most of his signings had not worked out. Now the club were rebuilding the Kemlyn Road stand, and the cost of that had an impact on Souness’ budget. If he wanted to buy, he’d have to sell first. So Dean Saunders was offloaded to Villa, and Piechnik arrived from FC Copenhagen for somewhere in the region of half a million quid.He’d been an integral part of the Danish side that had shocked the football world by winning the 1992 European Championships, a tournament they hadn’t originally even qualified for. Hopes were high that Piechnik could have a similar impact at Anfield to that of his compatriot, Jan Molby. Those hopes were short lived.

His debut came, ironically, against Aston Villa and Saunders. The Welsh striker gained his revenge on Souness by scoring twice in a 4-2 Villa win. It was a game which will forever be remembered for a glaring miss by Ronny Rosenthal, but it was a sign of things to come for poor old Torben. He struggled to cope with the English game, and had real trouble dealing with any strikers with pace. He was slow on the turn, you could say that milk turns quicker than Torben, and he was often exposed as the reds held a high defensive line.
His most humiliating moment came in the 1993/94 season at St James’ Park when he was hauled off at half time as Andy Cole had a field day, hitting a hat-trick in the opening half hour of the game. The Dane didn’t play for the club again, and was released by Roy Evans at the end of that season. In total he played 27 games for the club, not all of them bad it should be said.

He was far from a success at Anfield, yet there was something very likeable about him. He was never booed or jeered by the crowd, probably because everyone recognised how hard he tried and what a good guy he was. I remember travelling to Chesterfield for the return game after the 4-4 at Anfield, and the terraces were bouncing to the ‘Torben Piechnik – Teddy Bears picnic’ song. “La la la la la la la la, la la la la la la la la, la la la la la la la la Torben Piiiiiiiiiechnic” Good times…

Torben always made a point of staying on the field after the game and applauding the fans (a bit like they way Dirk Kuyt does now), and that meant he was cut a lot of slack. How can you boo someone like that? I liked Torben, even though I could see he was pretty . ‘ ’ is harsh, as clearly he was a decent player, he just wasn’t Liverpool standard, but it wasn’t for the lack of trying and I respect him for always giving his all.

I actually bumped into him in ‘Top Man’ in town a few months after he’d left. I said ‘hello’ and asked how come he was back in Liverpool. He said he was back to watch a game at Anfield because he had a free weekend, and he was also going to the club’s Christmas party. He may have been , but he still ruled. God bless you Torben!

by account deleted by request » Fri Oct 13, 2006 11:26 pm

by account deleted by request » Fri Oct 13, 2006 11:27 pm

by RUSHIE#9 » Fri Oct 13, 2006 11:35 pm

by account deleted by request » Fri Oct 13, 2006 11:41 pm

RUSHIE#9 wrote:There was more threat in front of goal from a slice of dundee cake than sean dundee (cack)!!

 

I remember reading at the time how Dundee might be as fast as Owen    First time I saw him play I couldnt believe how slow, cr@p and lazy he was.

by account deleted by request » Wed Oct 18, 2006 11:52 am

7 Istvan Kozma – The Hungarian was apparently pretty , although in fairness I’m not sure how people came to that conclusion as sightings of him at Anfield were only slightly more common than those of the ‘lesser spotted Frank McGarvey’. Istvan made only six league appearances for the reds, which I suppose in itself was testimony to his lack of quality. After all, if he couldn’t get a game in Graeme Souness’ God-awful side, he must have been pretty poor.

Souness had been impressed with Kozma’s form in the Scottish league with Dunfermline, where apparently he’d given Rangers a lot of problems whenever he’d faced them. Souness remembered that, and brought the player to Anfield for £300k in February 1992. He made ten appearances in two seasons for the club, but I must admit the only thing I remember about Kozma’s Liverpool career was one glorious 45 minute cameo in the remarkable 4-4 draw with Chesterfield in the League Cup at Anfield.

I was 18 years old, and was stood on the Kop with a couple of mates. We’d got in a few hours early, as we used to do back then to ensure we got the spec we wanted. The stadium was half empty that night, and those of us who were there could hardly believe what we witnessed in the first half. David James, Nick Tanner and Mark Wright were appalling, as Liverpool’s defence leaked like the proverbial sieve. Amazingly, the team from two divisions below the reds went into a 3-0 first half lead. It was shaping up to be one of the lowest points in the club’s history, until an unlikely hero arrived on the scene to save the day.

Kozma was introduced at half time, and was a revelation as he inspired a second half comeback that eventually saw the reds salvage a 4-4 draw. His trickery and crossing ability made a massive difference to the previously toothless reds, as Liverpool laid siege to the goal at the Kop end. The atmosphere in that second half was great, and it was all inspired by the Hungarian.

The Kop were in full voice that night, and it was probably the one and only time as a Liverpool player Kozma heard his name chanted. It was actually my mate who started it, giving it the “Iiiiiiiiiiiistvan, Iiiiiiiiiiiistvan” (just like “Iiiiiiiiigoorrrrrr”) after he’d set up a goal (for Ronny Rosenthal I think).

Having excelled in the Scottish League, Chesterfield was probably his level and it was the one and only time he made any impression as a Liverpool player. Not being able to get a game in one of the worst Liverpool sides in living memory says a lot. But never mind Istvan, we’ll always have that wonderous night against Chesterfield….. Altogether now, one for the road: “Iiiiiiiiiiiistvan, Iiiiiiiiiiiistvan!!!”

I thought people might need a picture of him as the last time he was mentioned I couldnt even remember him!

by account deleted by request » Fri Nov 03, 2006 4:55 pm

6 Phil Babb – Ok, we didn’t love him, far from it. But try thinking of Phil Babb with a straight face. Not easy is it? When I think of Phil Babb, I don’t think of his solitary Liverpool goal at former club Coventry. I don’t think of his total lack of talent, or his stupid shirt hanging out, cycling shorts crappy fashion sense. Well ok, I do think of all of those things, but not before I’ve thought of something else first. The name Phil Babb instantly conjures up one mental image for me, and it involves Babb, a goalpost, some seriously squashed nuts, and 40 odd thousand Liverpool fans torn between sniggering and wincing uncomfortably.

It says a lot for Babb’s general crapness that this is the defining moment of his Liverpool career. He cost the reds £3.6m, which was a record for a defender at that time. He’d had a very impressive World Cup for Ireland in 1994, including a superb display against Roberto Baggio’s Italy. Hopes were high when he and John Scales both arrived at Anfield within 24 hours of eachother early in the 1994/95 season. Roy Evans knew he needed to strengthen his defence, and by splashing out so much money on Scales and Babb he showed he really meant business.

It was clear from the start that Scales was a footballer as well as a defender, but Babb just never looked a ‘Liverpool player’. The uncomplicated style of the Irish suited Babb’s game down to the ground, but at Anfield he was expected to do a lot more than just win the ball and then launch it downfield. Used mostly on the left of the three man defence, he often found himself confronted by the opposition’s right winger, and it’s fair to say he had some problems, notably when he allowed Andrei Kanchelskis to give him the runaround in a 2-1 derby defeat at Anfield.

The ball was like a hot potato to him, he just never looked comfortable in possession. Playing on the left side of a back three meant that he had certain responsibilities to carry the ball forward, but he just couldn’t do it, largely due to possessing no footballing ability at all.

He had some pace, and defensively he did have some qualities, but in terms of sheer footballing attributes such as control, passing, and general skill, Phil Babb is the only Liverpool player that I genuinely believe possessed less footballing ability than me. As much as we often say “oh he’s , even I’m better than him” deep down, we know it’s not true. Someone like Paul Stewart was terrible for Liverpool, but put him in a game with you and your mates and you wouldn’t get near him, he’d be different class. I slated Josemi, but I know he’s light years more talented with a football than I’ll ever be. Babb was different, he really was totally lacking in talent.

His left foot was his strongest, yet to me his left foot was like Stig Bjornebye’s right foot. In other words, totally useless. Babb would play a pass or maybe try a shot with his left foot, and it would just look like a player using his weaker foot. I’m not sure what his right foot was actually like, as I never saw him use it.

When Gerard Houllier took over, there was no way Babb was ever going to survive at Anfield. Houllier was not slow to let players know if they were no longer needed, and the likes of McAteer, Harkness, James and Ince all moved on. Babb however, chose to sit on his picking up wages for doing nothing. Say what you like about Paul Ince (and I usually do), but at least he had enough professional pride to find himself another club when he was told he was not needed at Anfield.

Not Babb though, oh no. He was quite content to see out his contract, even though he was not even considered for the reserves such was his abysmal attitude. Tranmere took him on loan, but he was so bad that they couldn’t wait to send him back. I remember watching a Tranmere game on TV, and noticing that Babb had actually developed a little pot belly under his baggy shirt. No wonder he never tucked it into his shorts.

He must have had a good agent though, as once his Anfield contract had run down and he’d milked the club for every penny he could, Babb somehow he ended up getting a move to Sporting Lisbon. His time there was fairly short lived (no doubt they couldn’t believe how they’d been duped into signing him), and he returned to England with Sunderland. He was for them too.

Another thing I didn’t like about him, was that he was far too cocky for someone of his ability. He embraced the whole ‘Spice Boy’ thing perhaps more than any of the other players, and was always spotted out on the town. He was on astronomical wages for someone so , and it’s galling that one so completely lacking in talent made so much money out of our club.

I have a funny story about him come to think of it. He was once sent off in an away game (at Forest I think), and that night my mate saw him out in town. For some reason, my mate decided to go and talk to him (the ten pints he’d had may have had something to do with it!), so he wandered over to Babb (who was stood with other players, Collymore and James possibly if memory serves me correctly), and asked “I heard you got sent off today Phil, what happened?” Babb replied “Well the referee pulled this red card out of his pocket and told me I had to leave the field, so I did”. Now to be fair, that amused me greatly as it made my mate look a bit stupid and it was a funny line, but at the same time I’m thinking ‘cheeky arrogant , who are you to be acting cocky when you’re the worst footballer I’ve ever seen in a red shirt?’

If Phil Babb were a tv show, he’d be ‘Last of the Summer Wine’. An absolutely terrible, lame excuse for a comedy, that somehow managed to become known to everybody and land a primetime slot on a Sunday evening. The major difference between Babb and ‘Last of the Summer Wine’ would be that I’ve never laughed at ‘Last of the Summer Wine’.

Phil Babb played 170 times for Liverpool Football Club, and that saddens me greatly. A disgrace to his profession, it says a lot about him that he will best be remembered for crushing his against the post in a failed attempt to stop a goal that he had caused.

The only good thing about Phil Babb was the ‘match of the day’ song we had for him, “Babb Babb Babb Babb Babb Babb Babb Babb Babb, Babb Babb Babb Babb Babb Babb” That was class, he was not. He should have been called Phil Bad, or better still, Phil .

by stmichael » Fri Nov 03, 2006 4:58 pm

good old phil babb

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZE7auOanuwQ

by account deleted by request » Fri Nov 03, 2006 5:17 pm

ouch    Did they ever find them again?