Liverpool FC Forum

[66-1120597113]

To all young ladies out there!!
We are the Smeg team,we used to do this a while ago.....matchmaking it was called!
Most people have lighters now so we aint so busy!!

But hey we have a problem...we have a guy called SMEG!
And basically he needs a woman!
Let us tell you a bit about him................ Well here we have a fine handsome young hornball of the first degree .... ladies ... he needs to be handled with care and lots of tender loving ...
He is also an avid supporter of Liverpool - (the best team in the land) - and looks quite a bit like Liam Gallagher - God Bless him - he cant sing a note ! - not even in the KOP !!!!
   
He likes to bluetooth - hey hey !!! do u ?! - we hear it's the latest turn on but SMEG tell's us that it comes with a buzz .... - We here that wasps are in season tho !

So let's narrow this down for you ladies .... basically .. we are making an appeal on SMEGS behalf :

Do u meet the following criteria??

i) - Have you got all limbs? (They don't need to be in proportion)
ii)- Have you got hair? (this doesn't really matter ... it can be borrowed or stolen .... he's really not a fussy guy)
iii)- Are you under 14 stone? - (again this doesn't matter as he can borrow his cousins re-inforced bed)

The bottom line IS ... DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH - Do you have a fan.ny and a set of ti.ts...Cause if not we fear that this poor underse.xed young man might wa.nk himself through the roof!!

R.S.V.P TO - Wecantwait for SMEG.com - asap   

Please note -: (Only genuine applicant's will be considered ,,, c'mon this guy has been fuc..ked about enough !!!)

[adamnbarrett]

Poor smeg 

[Kash_Mountain]

Should we put a collection together and bribe some lass to spend the night with him 

I think they've tried that one, what he's probably looking for is a female sumo star, very chunky. 

[48-1119859832]

The poor lad comes on here to tell us his stories about his strange encounters and you lot make fun, that's truly a terrible thing to do. 

[jonnymac1979]

[adamnbarrett]

The poor lad comes on here to tell us his stories about his strange encounters and you lot make fun, that's truly a terrible thing to do. 

He know we're only messing.

But stick comes with posting threads like he's done past and present. Keep it to yourself and don't blab it out in threads. It doesn't really help thinking your God's gift either 

[48-1119859832]

The poor lad comes on here to tell us his stories about his strange encounters and you lot make fun, that's truly a terrible thing to do. 

He know we're only messing.

But stick comes with posting threads like he's done past and present. Keep it to yourself and don't blab it out in threads. It doesn't really help thinking your God's gift either 

Yeah, I know lad, I am joking with him too, but yeah he does seem to have a lot of arrogance about him, women don't usually like that, so that's probably why Smeg never scores. 

[jonnymac1979]

I think the lad has got a lot of balls posting the stuff he does on here, and his own picture!!!  He's only 17, probably doesn't know any better and I reckon he looks like Clark Kent off Smallville from his photograph so he's probably not a bad looking kid, but he'll learn from this that you can't post anything on Newkit without being torn to shreds so long may it continue.  It passes the time after all!!!!

[Kash_Mountain]

The poor lad comes on here to tell us his stories about his strange encounters and you lot make fun, that's truly a terrible thing to do. 

He know we're only messing.

But stick comes with posting threads like he's done past and present. Keep it to yourself and don't blab it out in threads. It doesn't really help thinking your God's gift either 

Yeah, if Smeg likes Sugar Mamas, plumper jumpers, thats fine    We're only messing   

[adamnbarrett]

The poor lad comes on here to tell us his stories about his strange encounters and you lot make fun, that's truly a terrible thing to do. 

He know we're only messing.

But stick comes with posting threads like he's done past and present. Keep it to yourself and don't blab it out in threads. It doesn't really help thinking your God's gift either 

Yeah, I know lad, I am joking with him too, but yeah he does seem to have a lot of arrogance about him, women don't usually like that, so that's probably why Smeg never scores. 

When he posted his own pics in the hunkzone was funny   

Again only messing mate. Keep it up, heard nay more from the girl in the shop?

[48-1119859832]

Yeah I saw that, it was amusing, one of the ladies on here made a  Ewwww    post. 

[jonnymac1979]

Can anyone come up with anything witty we can put on here and he can have it in his signature?

[48-1119859832]

Smeg, I wanna be adored.

[Bad Bob]

"Smeg's your Daddy"

[48-1119859832]

Smeg; I burnt my Arse on the lightbulb.