Liverpool FC Forum

s@int wrote:I said it was a bad joke 

Heres one for Nan while she's feeling lonely..... until I get there 

Why it's better to be a Woman!

1. We got off the Titanic first.

2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.

3. Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.

4. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.

5. We can cry and get off speeding fines.

6. We've never lusted after a cartoon character or the central female figure in a computer game.

7. Taxis stop for us.

8. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.

9. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.

10. Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).

11. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.

12. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.

13. New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.

14. It's possible to live our whole lives without ever taking a group shower.

15. We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.

16. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.

17. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.

18. If we have a zit, we know how to conceal it.

19. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.

20. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.

21. We don't have to memorize Caddyshack or Fletch to fit in.

22. We have the ability to dress ourselves.

23. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.

24. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.

25. Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.

26. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.

27. We'll never regret piercing our ears.

28. We can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

29. We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.

30. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions.

s@int wrote:30. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions.

Oh man.. tis true tis true about us guys not asking for directions.  

Woollyback wrote:metalhead, we don't ask for directions because we don't NEED directions. fact.

I do,never been as lost looking for places in work cause of Sat Nav!
B@stards them things!

Took me into the hospital grounds looking for a house that was on the other side of the motorway last week!

Woollyback wrote:metalhead, we don't ask for directions because we don't NEED directions. fact.

Im stubborn as a donkey when it comes to directions, I rarely ask 

Woollyback wrote:satnav's for girls

whats a satnav?

Woollyback wrote:metalhead, we don't ask for directions because we don't NEED directions. fact.

True. In an argument, the womans storms off to the kitchen.
Men storm off to the pub.

We all know the directions !