Liverpool FC Forum

jonnymac1979 wrote:A TRUE STORY

Was in Town last night (with my mate), or for the benefit of the OOTERS, Liverpool City Centre.  Met this bird in this bar I was in.  I'll be honest, she was a fucking belter, way, way, way better than my usual low standards.  She was mustard.  I'm not kidding, she was good.  I've no reason to lie.  I'm not shy to admit if I've been with a dog (again, for the benefit of OOTERS, a dog in Liverpool is a lady who is, shall we say, not pleasing on the eye, not some Keith Lard escapade...), but I was proud of this one last night.  She was fit.  Couldn't believe my luck.  You've no idea how good she looked.

She had one of those Victoria Beckham 'bob' haircuts (the ladies will know what I'm talking about), nearly as tall as me (6ft1in) and dead slim and toned.  I'm a single man, and I like that status, it suits me right down to the ground.  But I knew after five minutes of talking to this girl that I wanted to see her again, maybe even tonight, I don't know...  I was hooked last night.  Held her hand and everything.

So when I was putting her in a taxi by Lewis's to go home, I asked her what her number was and we had a sly kiss, haha.  Anyway, I typed her number into my phone and I closed my phone (my phones one of those ones that you 'fold' like the RAZR but mine's a shit Nokia).

I hadn't stored it.  Gone.  Forever.

So her taxi's gone, and when I realised what I'd done, I shouted out loud "SHHHHIIIIIIIITTTTTT!!!!!!"  Some random lad asked me what was wrong and when I told him, I could see he felt dead sorry for me but was laughing anyway!!!!  I wasn't laughing, if I hadn't of been that pissed, I reckon I would have done a Shawshank Redemption and dropped to my knees, opened my arms and just looked to the sky in absolute sorrow as the snow fell down on me!!!!

You've no idea how furious I am with myself this morning.  Absoutely no idea.  Absoutely NO IDEA.