Date - 28th April
Time - about half nine (pm)
Ambient Temp - Mild evening. Going dark.
Subject 1 - A ginger nut
Subject 2 - A rich tea (no digestives in sorry)
Control - Cup of tea nearly 2 minutes old (Tetley's one sugar with milk, in my black plastic field mug) approx 74 C - 165 F. 'very hot' in other words
Experiment: To see how long each subject could last before either: a) disintegrating or b) getting pulled off the job early - due to 'bottling it' as a result of imminent collapse.
Results: (in both cases, a single 'dunk' was performed at an angle of about 95 degrees) The recorded longevity of each biscuit is as follows:
Subject 1 = 5.1 seconds (critical breaking point approached) extracted immediately. Survived the flight towards my gob. Just about.
Subject 2 = 3.8 seconds (critical breaking point observed) The biscuit did not prevail and as a result, half of it fell off en route to its final destination. Making a right mess on one of my cushions.
Conclusions: Rich tea? and dunking? = FORGET IT! Unless you want to miss half your telly viewing time.
Considerations: Ginger nuts faired reasonably well overall. 5.1 seconds is a respectable score*** - although in defence of the Rich tea i will say this. It is sometimes preferrable to have a quick-dunk with maximum liquid absorption and a fast 'extraction to mouth' rate. Than be hanging around for longer than is necessary thus taking your eyes off the telly in order to complete a satisfying dunk without fretting over your upholstery. There is a case for the 'all-in-one-sweep-not-looking' method whilst freeing up the other hand for other recreational tasks i suppose. So Rich tea can still take some pride out of this comprehensive and definitive experiment. Basically they are great for dual purpose 'dunk 'n' W*nk' fans. As i would presume Digestives might be...
*** A plain hobnob performing under similar test conditions achieved an impressive score of 7.9 seconds. (Once i might add - the rest of the packet were lesser mortals) I must have produced the 'Queen hobnob' there and then first out the packet! Which goes towards confirming that stamina above all else is a desirable and necessary quality to possess in the cut-throat underworld of the biscuit best suited to the serial dunker and his craft.
Yes, say what you will about them...though flavoursome as they indeed are, the ugly Hobnobs remain the 'Lepers' of the biscuit fraternity - but by god they've got guts!
This concludes the report of my findings and establishes Hobnobs as the outright boss biccy
