Liverpool FC Forum

[The Red Baron]

my son wants to take his goldfish on holiday,anyone know if they get car sick.

[The Red Baron]

A young man in a wheelchair rolls on to the stage, and Matthew Kelly
Introduces him as Simon.

MK: "It's very brave you coming out here in your wheelchair - can you
tell the audience what happened?"

Simon: "About a year ago, I was driving with my uncle when we had a
really big accident.

Unfortunately, my uncle was killed outright, but I survived, trapped in
the car for 6 hours and had to be cut free.

The doctors had me in surgery for 12 hours, but they couldn't save my
legs."

MK: "That's terrible, but I see you have legs now, are they artificial?"

Simon: "No, Matthew, whilst in hospital, the doctors advised me that the
uncle who had been in the car with me had passed away, but that his legs
were fine, and that with all the advances in medical science, they could
graft his legs onto my body. I have been having physiotherapy for
6 months, and I hope to be walking again by the end of the year."

Much applause.

MK: "That's fantastic. So, Simon, who are you going to be?"
Simon: "Tonight Matthew I'm going to be....

.......... Simon and Halfuncle

 

[112-1077774096]

ah well i just bought my new liverpool shirt in bangkok

How much that cost you a tenner   

i'm a better haggler than that mate, and i can haggle in thai so that helps to bring the price down     

La kar tao rai ?   

ra ka thao rai     


har roi baht

[The Red Baron]

Love you long time

[dawson99]

2 dollar??

laters potatoes, im off for a drink or 100000

[112-1077774096]

what your name where you flom   

[woof woof !]

ah well i just bought my new liverpool shirt in bangkok

How much that cost you a tenner   

i'm a better haggler than that mate, and i can haggle in thai so that helps to bring the price down     

La kar tao rai ?   

ra ka thao rai     


har roi baht

£7.00 ? , talk about exploiting your hosts        

[112-1077774096]

ah well i just bought my new liverpool shirt in bangkok

How much that cost you a tenner   

i'm a better haggler than that mate, and i can haggle in thai so that helps to bring the price down     

La kar tao rai ?   

ra ka thao rai     


har roi baht

£7.00 ? , talk about exploiting your hosts  :

yeah, it started at 20 quid, but they dont call me marvin haggler for nothing   

[woof woof !]

yeah, it started at 20 quid, but they dont call me marvin haggler for nothing   

Kun ru dai yangai kao ruak kun "Marvin Haggler" ?   

[account deleted by request]

STARS IN THIER EYE'S


A young man in a wheelchair rolls on to the stage, and Matthew Kelly
Introduces him as Simon.

MK: "It's very brave you coming out here in your wheelchair - can you
tell the audience what happened?"

Simon: "About a year ago, I was driving with my uncle when we had a
really big accident.

Unfortunately, my uncle was killed outright, but I survived, trapped in
the car for 6 hours and had to be cut free.

The doctors had me in surgery for 12 hours, but they couldn't save my
legs."

MK: "That's terrible, but I see you have legs now, are they artificial?"

Simon: "No, Matthew, whilst in hospital, the doctors advised me that the
uncle who had been in the car with me had passed away, but that his legs
were fine, and that with all the advances in medical science, they could
graft his legs onto my body. I have been having physiotherapy for
6 months, and I hope to be walking again by the end of the year."

Much applause.

MK: "That's fantastic. So, Simon, who are you going to be?"
Simon: "Tonight Matthew I'm going to be....

.......... Simon and Halfuncle

Genius     

[112-1077774096]

yeah, it started at 20 quid, but they dont call me marvin haggler for nothing   

Kun ru dai yangai kao ruak kun "Marvin Haggler" ?   

i walk up and say,   pom chu marvin haggler, ra ka thao rai.

then when they give the price i say paeng bai, lot noi dai mai

then they will take about 100 baht off when really i want them to divide the price by four. so i laugh and give them the price i want to pay until we reach agreement, usually less than half that they ask for origionally.

actually i also learnt the symbols for thai numbers as a lot of places i visit have the price in thai and in english, when you know the thai numbers you can see foreigners are expected to pay twice as much as locals. this happened when i went the zoo. mostly they use the same numbers as us unless they are charging foriegners more then they use thai number for thai price and our numbers for our price

[account deleted by request]

Taff was sitting in the Dog and Gorilla, talking to Dawson. "Lad, look out there in the field. Do you see that wall? Look how well it's built. I built that wall stone by stone with me own two hands. I piled it for months. But do they call me Taff the wall Builder? Nooo.."

"Then Taff gestured to the bar. "Look here at the bar. Do ya see how smooth and polished it is? I planed that surface down. I carved that wood with me own hard labour, for eight days. But do they call me Taff the bar builder? Nooo..."

Then Taff points out of the window. "Dawson, look out to sea. Do you see that pier that stretches out as far as the eye can see? I built that pier with the sweat off me back. I nailed it board by board. But do they call me  Taff the pier Builder? Nooo..."

Taff looks around nervously, trying to make sure no one is paying attention. "But you f*ck one sheep..."

[Rafa D]

I thought you get called Marvin Haggler because your face looks like a bulldog on a nettle

[anti-hero]

Taff was sitting in the Dog and Gorilla, talking to Dawson. "Lad, look out there in the field. Do you see that wall? Look how well it's built. I built that wall stone by stone with me own two hands. I piled it for months. But do they call me Taff the wall Builder? Nooo.."

"Then Taff gestured to the bar. "Look here at the bar. Do ya see how smooth and polished it is? I planed that surface down. I carved that wood with me own hard labour, for eight days. But do they call me Taff the bar builder? Nooo..."

Then Taff points out of the window. "Dawson, look out to sea. Do you see that pier that stretches out as far as the eye can see? I built that pier with the sweat off me back. I nailed it board by board. But do they call me  Taff the pier Builder? Nooo..."

Taff looks around nervously, trying to make sure no one is paying attention. "But you f*ck one sheep..."

You just replaced "Old Man" with Taff!

You bastard!     

[account deleted by request]

I know its an old one but it still makes me laugh.