Liverpool FC Forum

by **account deleted by request** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 3:38 pm

At the end of a tiny deserted bar is a huge scouse bloke named Lando- 6ft 5in tall and 350lbs. He's having a few beers when a short, well dressed and obviously gay man named Dawson walks in and sits beside him. After 3 or 4 beers, Dawson finally plucks up the courage to say something to the big Liverpudlian.
Leaning over, he cups his huge ear: "Do you want a blow job?" he whispers.
At this, Lando leaps up with fire in his eyes and smacks the man in the face. Knocking him off the stool, he proceeds to beat him all the way out of the bar. Finally he leaves him, badly bruised, in the car park and returns to his seat as if nothing had happened.
Amazed the bartender quickly brings over another beer. "I've never seen you react like that" he says. "Just what did he say to you Lando?"
"I'm not sure" Lando replies. "Something about a job."

by **dawson99** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 3:39 pm

oh the mancs jokes, the poor old mancs....

:wwww

by **Judge** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:13 pm

cheers dawson, oops mr birch

by **dawson99** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:19 pm

Judge wrote:cheers dawson, oops mr birch

just call me dawson dude, well not dawson dude, just dawson.

dude.

by **dawson99** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:19 pm

actually, did i tell u my surname ever? k??? :laugh:

by **account deleted by request** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:28 pm

Sorry about posting same joke twice so I changed the one posted on here

by **dawson99** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:35 pm

s@int wrote:At the end of a tiny deserted bar is a huge scouse bloke named Lando- 6ft 5in tall and 350lbs. He's having a few beers when a short, well dressed and obviously gay man named Dawson walks in and sits beside him. After 3 or 4 beers, Dawson finally plucks up the courage to say something to the big Liverpudlian.
Leaning over, he cups his huge ear: "Do you want a blow job?" he whispers.
At this, Lando leaps up with fire in his eyes and smacks the man in the face. Knocking him off the stool, he proceeds to beat him all the way out of the bar. Finally he leaves him, badly bruised, in the car park and returns to his seat as if nothing had happened.
Amazed the bartender quickly brings over another beer. "I've never seen you react like that" he says. "Just what did he say to you Lando?"
"I'm not sure" Lando replies. "Something about a job."

thats bang out of order....

... im not short!!!

:wwww

by **LFC #1** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:37 pm

dawson99 wrote:
s@int wrote:At the end of a tiny deserted bar is a huge scouse bloke named Lando- 6ft 5in tall and 350lbs. He's having a few beers when a short, well dressed and obviously gay man named Dawson walks in and sits beside him. After 3 or 4 beers, Dawson finally plucks up the courage to say something to the big Liverpudlian.
Leaning over, he cups his huge ear: "Do you want a blow job?" he whispers.
At this, Lando leaps up with fire in his eyes and smacks the man in the face. Knocking him off the stool, he proceeds to beat him all the way out of the bar. Finally he leaves him, badly bruised, in the car park and returns to his seat as if nothing had happened.
Amazed the bartender quickly brings over another beer. "I've never seen you react like that" he says. "Just what did he say to you Lando?"
"I'm not sure" Lando replies. "Something about a job."

thats bang out of order....

... im not short!!!

you are where it counts.

by **dawson99** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:38 pm

thats just plain mean, saying i have a small nose

and a large hose!!!!

(it has to be the weather making us mad, lets all do haiku)

by **account deleted by request** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:47 pm

I thought a haiku had to be thirteen words not fourteen like yours

by **The Red Baron** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:55 pm

Afternoon chaps,nice to see someone else in here for the afternoon session, whos getting the ale in.

by **dawson99** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:56 pm

I never said mine was a haiku, just said we should do one

red baron, first rounds on me... 3 of us, afternoon in the real world, that makes it pimms o clock

by **The Red Baron** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:58 pm

The suns well over the yard arm so count me in

by **dawson99** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:58 pm

Three things are certain:
football, beer, and lovely tads.
Guess which is best.

cool, pimms all round!!!

by **The Red Baron** » Mon Jul 03, 2006 4:59 pm

Ill go for the beer served by someone with lovely tads

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