Liverpool FC Forum

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 11:42 am**

i love a good boffin - and where would the world be without them? still stuck in the stone age in all probability. so lets take the chance to celebrate some of these vast minds and decide who was first in the queue when god handed out brains. lets have a look at the main contenders...

einstein - a true boffin, complete and utter genius. capable of pulling astonishingly silly faces. he changed the way we think about reality though maybe didn't make enough of his media opportunities

professor heinz wolf - who of my generation can forget 'the great egg race'? one of the best thngs ever on tv, science and boffinacity combined with monty pythonesque ridiculousness. and presiding over it all the teutonic uberboffin heinz wolf. there was nothing this guy didn't know about the safe transportation of eggs. is he still alive?

magnus pike - often imitated but never bettered. half boffin, half windmill - pure legend.

wilf lunn - the boffin from vision on with the great moustache. made some excellent devices but always seemed to have a problem with some enormous purple furry worm.

carol vorderman - totty boffin. expert in words, numbers and the lowering of cholestorol. the goddess of winter afternoons. but did she ever ponk richard whiteley?

adam hart davies - a hugely underestimated boffin. shows remarkable panache and gets stuck in. brave use of cycling shorts on a regular basis. for some reason reminds me of my grandad. my personal choice.

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 12:01 pm**

Carol Vorderman isn't really a boffin. I've got a higher IQ than she has!

I'd have to go for Sir Isaac Newton I'm afraid.

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 1:03 pm**

Surely it's Barnes Wallis ? the fella that invented the "bouncing bomb" , Obviously a footy fanatic and an advocate of the long ball tactic.

loved that ad btw were the german sentry strips off his coat and plays goalie .

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 1:16 pm**

Has to be Carol.How she manages those sums without an abacus is just beyond me.Even Des looks impressed

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 2:29 pm**

Gotta be Heinz Wolf, he had proper mad-professor eyebrows and everything just like all professors should. In fact, professors shouldn't be graded on intelligence or qualifications or reputation, there should be a special "eyebrow bushiness index" enabling quick and easy comparison between different professors

Heinz Wolf also appeared in a photoshoot in Loaded magazine many years ago with a very scantily-clad Jo Guest sprawled over him and still demonstrated a characteristically Teutonic level of attention to detail by concentrating on his work rather than the size of the upwelling in his pants, a feat of incredible difficulty for which he is to be highly commended. (rumour has it he had the best w@nk of his life later that night

)

As for Carol Vorderman there would be no boffin whatsoever between me & her, she should be thrown to the lions the annoying, face-ache, delusions of youthfulness, smug bitch

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 2:38 pm**

heinz appears to have done a runner from the photos but here is ol' guestie looking as classy (

) as ever, imagine being able to conduct scientific experiments with that sat across your lap? pure genius

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 2:53 pm**

woof woof ! wrote:Surely it's Barnes Wallis ? the fella that invented the "bouncing bomb" , Obviously a footy fanatic and an advocate of the long ball tactic.

loved that ad btw were the german sentry strips off his coat and plays goalie .

Great ad thatWoof was taken off as it might cause offence ....maddness

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 2:53 pm**

Trust Woolly to lower the tone again!!!

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 2:54 pm**

by the way the best proffesor Ihave ever seen was Will Hay genius

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 3:00 pm**

who's will hay, RB? inventor of the hackney cab or something?

and woolly, if you can dig up any of those pics of heinz wolf with guesty sprawled across him i'll be yer best mate.

barnes wallace doesn't qualify for boffinhood, he was a one trick pony. a boffin is generally clever on many fronts. just like heinz wolf was probably very nearly clever all over jo guests front (allegedly).

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 7:23 pm**

andy_g wrote:who's will hay, RB? inventor of the hackney cab or something

Will Hay was a comic genius who often played the part of a poroffesor /teacher in boys schools.You must have seen him.

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 7:54 pm**

Ok if you lot don't fancy Barnes Wallis ,how about Dr Emmet Brown ,inventor of the time machine as shown in the drama documentary "Back to the Future"

Posted: **Thu Nov 10, 2005 8:16 pm**

Magnus Pike for me ....very very clever man and with all that waving of his arms he could have washed 30 cars an hour

Posted: **Wed Nov 16, 2005 5:34 am**

Ugg the Caveman. He invented fire and the wheel.

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